Public Restrooms

“Fame lost its appeal for me when I went into a public restroom and an autograph seeker handed me a pen and paper under the stall door.” ~ Marlo Thomas

Public restrooms seem to be a necessary evil. Sometimes dirty, always smelly. They are like the drive-thrus of the potty world. You get in and get out, hopefully washing your hands sometime in between. As simple as that concept seems to be there are those that don't seem to quite understand.

Example #1 : The stall-to-stall talker

It's bad enough that you have to use a public restroom, you don't want everyone else knowing that its you in that stall. However, you run into that person that happens to be going to the restroom at the same time and they want to chat. Never satisfied with a quick 'hello' they continue the conversation even once y'all are both in your stalls. They want to ask 'how are you doing' or 'how is your Mother' while you are trying to do your business. Or you fall victim to TWO stall-to-stall talkers and you get to listen to their conversation as all three of you are in the stalls.

I don't know about anyone else, but I like to pee in peace. I don't want to talk to you while I am doing it and I don't need to hear about your weekend as you discuss it with your friend in the next stall.

Example #2 : The cell phone talker

I suppose this falls in line with example #1 except I can't hear who they are talking to and they aren't talking to me. It baffles me how anyone would be comfortable talking on their cell phone WHILE using the restroom. In today's society of cell phones growing out of people's ears I guess I shouldn't be surprised, but please..it's the bathroom...THE BATHROOM.

Example #3 : The comfort pisser

The comfort pisser is unlike us normal restroom users in that they don't have the same dislike of public restrooms. No, the comfort pisser has no problem making any and all bodily noises as if they were in their own bathroom at home. They have no problem hanging out in their stall for 5 or 10 minutes, possibly even longer. The comfort pisser likes to stretch out, with their feet so far apart that they have their toes hanging into your stall space. And they don't seem to have a problem with their pants/skirts/ shorts being pushed completely to the restroom floor...yuck. I don't know what they are doing in there, I probably don't want to know, but they don't seem to view public restrooms as an in-and-out type place like the rest of us.

I know people that refuse to use public restrooms and others who will use them only if they have to. I don't necessarily have a huge aversion to them, BUT nothing beats the comfort of your own bathroom at home.